The pattern of self in women with borderline personality disorder in the context of their life narratives: A qualitative study

Introduction: Although self-disturbance is considered as an essential aspect of borderline personality disorder, there is little knowledge about its nature in affected individuals. Aim: The present study aimed to determine the patterns of self in women with borderline personality disorder. Method: This study was a basic research with a qualitative approach. The statistical population consisted of women with borderline personality disorder in Mashhad and psychologists and psychiatrists in Mashhad and Tehran, Iran, in 2021. Fifteen women with borderline personality disorder were selected by convenience sampling using Leichsenring's Borderline Questionnaire (1999) from Ibn Sina Hospital in Mashhad, and eight specialists were selected through purposive sampling. Data was collected through semi-structured interviews and coded through thematic analysis. Results: In the data analysis, five main themes, including self-knowledge, self-agency, loneliness, self and injury, and self and emotions, were identified. The self-knowledge theme has two sub-themes, namely, lack of self-awareness and instability. Self-agency included two external and internal themes. Loneliness was also divided into three themes of rejection, being misunderstood, and avoidance. Self and injury contained the themes of self pathology and self-harm, and finally, the main theme of self and emotions was divided into positive and negative emotions. Conclusion: In women with borderline personality disorder, under the influence of adverse and harmful experiences from early relationships and due to the accumulation of unprocessed emotions that cause impulsive behaviors, the self is incoherent, unstable with low self-awareness, and weak agency in facing life difficulties. Therefore; the extracted themes can provide a more comprehensive understanding of these individuals.